Some words carry weight—responsibility, empathy, humility, and trust, for example. But for people with narcissistic traits, these words might as well be written in a foreign language. Why? Because using them would mean admitting they’re not always right, not always in control, and not always the center of the universe. Here’s a closer look at 15 things narcissists often avoid saying—because to them, these phrases feel like personal threats rather than expressions of maturity.
1. “I Take Responsibility”
To a narcissist, being responsible doesn’t come naturally—especially if it involves admitting a mistake. If something goes wrong, their first instinct is to point the finger at someone else. Admitting fault would damage the image they work hard to maintain: that they’re flawless and superior. So instead, they rewrite events, twist the truth, and make you question reality just to avoid uttering this one simple sentence.
2. “I Really Understand What They’re Going Through”
Empathy means stepping into someone else’s shoes and actually caring about how they feel. But narcissists aren’t keen on that kind of emotional vulnerability. They may pretend to be sympathetic if it helps them get what they want, but deep down, they’re more interested in control than connection. Feeling someone else’s pain? That’s not part of their script.
3. “I’m Truly Sorry”
A genuine apology requires self-awareness and empathy—two things narcissists often lack. Sure, they might say “sorry” when cornered, but it usually comes with conditions, like “I’m sorry you feel that way.” The idea of admitting they were wrong? That’s too much of a blow to their ego. They’d rather spin the story or guilt you into apologizing instead.
Read more: 13 Quiet Ways Trauma Shows Up in a Person Without Them Realizing
4. “I’ve Been Struggling Emotionally”
Opening up about emotions is hard for many people—but for narcissists, it’s almost impossible. Sharing their inner struggles means revealing they’re human, and that threatens the image they want you to see. Instead of showing vulnerability, they often mask their feelings behind arrogance, criticism, or blame.
5. “I Value Your Opinion”
Narcissists tend to see conversations as competitions, not collaborations. So, asking for someone else’s opinion—or worse, genuinely considering it—isn’t something they do often. They typically believe their viewpoint is the only one that matters. Respecting other perspectives would require stepping down from their imaginary throne, and that’s not a move they’re willing to make.
6. “I Respect Your Boundaries”
Boundaries are healthy and necessary in relationships—but to a narcissist, they’re an obstacle. If you try to set limits with them, they may brush it off, mock you, or even make you feel guilty for asserting your needs. For them, respecting boundaries means giving up control, and that’s something they’d rather avoid at all costs.
7. “I Made a Mistake and I’ve Grown from It”
Personal growth takes humility. It means acknowledging you messed up, learning something from it, and doing better next time. Narcissists? Not so much. They may fake a little self-improvement if it helps them impress someone, but admitting to a mistake is a rare event. To them, learning from failure means admitting they’ve failed—something they go to great lengths to avoid.
8. “I’m Thankful for the People Around Me”
Gratitude is about recognizing the value others bring into your life. Narcissists, however, often see people as tools—there to admire them, support them, or make them look good. Saying “thank you” from the heart would require them to admit they’re not entirely self-sufficient. And that’s not the message they’re trying to send.
9. “I’m Going to Do Something Kind Just Because”
Acts of kindness, especially ones done quietly and without fanfare, don’t tend to come naturally to narcissists. They may do something “nice” if it earns them praise or attention—but genuine, quiet compassion? That’s not their usual way of operating. If someone’s struggling, the narcissist might acknowledge it briefly—before redirecting the focus back to themselves.
Read more: People With Hidden Insecurities Often Say These 10 Things Without Thinking
10. “We Make a Great Team”
Teamwork requires collaboration and mutual respect. Narcissists, though, often see themselves as the star of the show. Others are simply background characters. They might say “team” when it helps their image, but behind the scenes, they often compete with or undermine others to stay in control. They want the spotlight—not to share it.
11. “I Reflect and Grow Through Meditation or Self-Work”
True self-growth takes effort, reflection, and a willingness to change. That’s a tall order for narcissists. They already see themselves as perfect—or at least, they want you to believe they are. The idea that they might need to change? That’s too threatening. So while they might throw around buzzwords like “growth,” it’s usually just talk.
12. “That Was My Fault”
Accountability is hard for most people—but for narcissists, it’s almost unbearable. Admitting they caused a problem challenges their carefully managed image. So instead of taking responsibility, they’ll deflect, excuse, or blame. And if they do say the words “I’m sorry,” it’s often part of a manipulation rather than a true apology.
13. “Trust Is the Core of This Relationship”
Trust requires openness and consistency. But narcissists often treat trust as a one-way street. They might demand your trust while giving very little in return. For them, trust isn’t about mutual respect—it’s about control. They may use the word to pressure others into submission, but they rarely show trust in any meaningful way.
14. “I Can Improve—I See That Now”
Improvement begins with self-awareness. Narcissists avoid that kind of introspection because it means facing uncomfortable truths. It’s much easier (and safer for their ego) to blame someone else than to acknowledge a need for change. The phrase “I can do better” is rare in their vocabulary, because it admits they weren’t already the best.
15. “It’s Just the Right Thing to Do”
Doing something purely out of integrity, with no benefit to themselves, is not how narcissists typically operate. Their decisions are often driven by what they stand to gain—status, admiration, control—not by principles. They might say they care about doing the right thing, but if there’s nothing in it for them, it rarely gets done.
Read more: Psychologists Say These 8 Phrases Will Instantly Disarm An Arrogant Person
Final Thoughts
Everyone can show narcissistic tendencies from time to time—but consistent patterns of denial, blame-shifting, manipulation, and lack of empathy are hallmarks of something deeper. If someone in your life avoids these phrases like the plague, it might be worth taking a closer look at the relationship dynamics. And if you find yourself constantly adjusting your behavior to keep the peace, that might be your first clue.
Image: Freepik.
